Day 1 Sunrise:
Today is the beginning of a month-long grief project to fill October’s infant loss awareness month. I have participated in the project for many years and just like our grief changes, so has this project. This year is less about sharing our children and more about honoring them in our journey to heal. I know that there are days I plan to change a bit to meet the needs of my heart but I love the guidance the CarlyMarie Project Heal (#CaptureYourGrief) gives. I hope you join me each day as I share my journey through my own grief and hope.
Today I have chosen to quote, “They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite.” because even after eight years, there are still wounds in my heart. There is no time limit on grief. It stays with you every day of the rest of your life. Grief does change though. As the years go on, it morphs into different things. You feel differently, you deal with things differently. I continue to do this project to express how things change from year to year. It also gives me dedicated time to focus on the many blessings of Clara’s short life, my loss, and my growth/healing.
Good morning sunrise! Good morning Miss Clara! Today we begin a new chapter. #CaptureYourGrief #WhatHealsYou
October is here and with it comes a month of openness about my loss. This project is always one of growth and healing for me. I both enjoy and fear this journey but I always know that in it I find great comfort.
As always Day #1 is about the sunrise. Today is a dreary day with tons of clouds. I wasn’t able to get an amazing sunrise picture but what I did capture is the essence of this project. You see that tiny pink flower in the pot? Tiny. That is the first new flower that has risen from the leaves since our move to Iowa. It is growth! This plant is the last surviving one from Clara’s funeral. I worried that after 2 years I may never see the lovely pink flowers again. This week I was pleasantly surprised and humbly reminded that growth isn’t always quick. Growth takes time just as healing does.
This project may not be for everyone today. You may feel lost or overwhelmed. You might be too early in your journey or feel the loss was too long ago to bring up. Today just remember that it doesn’t matter how quickly you grow and heal but that you never stop working toward it.
Hugs from Iowa!
Sunrise: 7:03am October 1, 2015 (North Liberty, IA)
I caught the beauty just before the sun rose over the horizon. For me it captures the anticipation and the shadows we sometimes feel through our journey. It shares my own anticipation and sometimes lack of patience.
The quote says everything this project is about. Clara’s life was little and yet touch so many. The grief that goes with the loss of that small life is nothing short of monumental.
Sunrise – 7:03am -October 1, 2014 – North Liberty IA
As the sun rises on the first day of Infant Loss, Stillborn, and SIDS Awareness Month I begin another year of the CarlyMarie Project. It is a project I continue to look forward to each year as it gives me a chance to search my heart, shed some tears, and look back at the little life we once held. It gives me comfort to reflect each day with such purpose and love.
My journey this year begins with the rising of the sun. So often we awe at the beauty of each sunrise and similarly we do at the birth of our child(ren). The sunrise reminds me of the little girl we held for a short time and the joy that came with her. Just as the sunrise is short, so was her life on Earth. But the promise of the sunrise each morning reminds me of the promise I will see her again in Heaven for each sunrise is another day closer to seeing her again.
Day #1: Sunrise
Sunrise is such a beautiful thing and as I begin this project I am reminded of the beautiful birth of Clara. It truly felt like a new beginning. Today I chose to take a picture of the sunrise at our local park. It represents the sun rising each morning and knowing we are missing our little girl playing each day. I took this picture and then noticed a little girls sandal in the sand. I looked through that camera and realized it was in every picture I took this morning. You can see it in the bottom of the picture. I thought it was the perfect (unplanned) touch that God added as I prayed and began this project.
The lone shoe reminds me of the abrutness of her departure and the footprint she has left behind. It is always there.
The shoe also reminds me that she is with me, in my heart, every morning when the sun rises.
If you haven’t heard of the Carly Marie Project… Follow the link below to see what it is all about. #CaptureYourGrief