As Haleigh gets older I am in awe at the things she is doing.  She has shared with us her first smile, first giggles, first poop-spoltion daipers, first night of sleeping 9hours, you get my drift.  One first we are approaching is the day when she is older, on earth, than her sister.  In a few short days that day will be here.  As we count down the days and continue to add to the list of Haleigh’s 1st’s I am saddened by some of the things that were so abrubtly taken away 4 years ago.  I still wonder how we made it through our loss, how we didn’t allow us to consume us and our brand new marriage.  Some how we made it back to land from the sea of grief.   I am always amazed that it can be done.  We did it!!

As I look at the week ahead I am nervous.   We are traveling and will be in the company of teenage camp counselors who will be tending to Haleigh while we attend bibles studies.  While I am excited for time to focus on God, I am nervous because these young people will be caring for and napping our little girl during a very stressful time for me.  I have never been to the training they have gotten, whether it be through the camp or baby sitting classes, so I have no idea what kind of baby care classes they have been to.  It just makes me anxious because Clara passed while at daycare…a wonderful mother with 5 children of her own!!

Today I have decided that this week will be a great time to influence some young people on safe sleep habits for babies.  Why not?!?!  Just like each person’s testimony about their walks with God can bring one to God, maybe someone with a testimony to why safe sleep is important may stay with them for a lifetime.  I hope it will bring me comfort knowing that they will take excellent care of Haleigh.  I have never taken our babies to daycare around this milestone so this is a good step in my grief, trust, and faith.  I am ready to face that challenge 🙂

As with Lincoln and Preston, I am always excited to share pictures of our big goal and “mini celebration”.  Be watching for pictures!  It will be a great sigh of relief and then we will be on to our 6m old goal.